Tuesday, May 31, 2005

Shittiest Shit Ever Shat, vol. 5: Almost Hades

Need I say anything? I think the picture up there says it all.

Of course I do. You can't really call this an 80's song anymore, as you're forced to listen to it whenever your roommate or lover or mom insists on watching Fame for Farmers, excuse me, I mean Footloose, on cable. Again. Isn't two decades of Footloose enough? Do we really need to see Kevin Bacon dancing in a barn again? I know, I know, if you don't like it, don't turn it on. But I swear, it seems to just come on all by itself.

Here's the obligatory power ballad from the movie, by Mike Reno (Loverboy) and Ann Wilson (Heart), which you will listen to because you don't remember exactly how bad it is:

Mike Reno & Ann Wilson - Almost Hades, I mean Paradise (1984 - Footloose OST)

It seems like perfect love's so hard to find
I'd almost given up
You must have read my mind

And all these dreams I saved for a rainy day
They're finally comin' true
I'll share them all with you


That Girl said...

now my brain is toggling between both of these songs. thanks for that. >:-/

Canowine said...

I'd apologize, but before I do it to you, I unfortunately have to do it to myself, and sometimes, the people I work with. You should have heard us singing the Deborah Gibson last Tuesday at lunch. Yeah, RC666 was here, too.

SugarDuck said...

I hated those 80s ballads so much. Thanks for the memories. That really takes me back. What a godawful song.

SugarDuck said...

Dave Barry had a good description that reminds me of this song, and all 80s ballads. Something like, "he sings as if in the throes of extreme intestinal distress."

Canowine said...

Glad I could take you back, sugarduck. I'm think this will make a great song for the reception. First, we all have to put our collars up and french roll our suit pants.

That Girl said...

It's OK, we were singing Tiffany, "I Think We're Alone Now" on Friday at work. Nothing worse than "and you put your arms around me and we stumble to the ground and then you say..."

(haha! I hope that's in your head now!)

thephoenixnyc said...


Canowine said...

that girl - the Tiffany was already in my head earlier thanks to that new reality TV show in which Tiffany will sing again. Egad. And Arethusa sang it a little while ago on one of the Deborah G posts.

But thank you so much for making me think of it again tonight, because I wouldn't have been able to go to bed without that.

thephoenixnyc - don't even try to resist. It calls to you.

RC666 said...

All weekend I was actually singing "Come Sail Away" Styx. I would sing it and play it in the background while I killed people on xbox. "I'm sailing away" damnit now it's in my head again. "we built this city on rock and roll" thats not better, damn 80s music has invaded my brain!!

Canowine said...

Be careful, man, because now whenever you hear Styx you're going to feel like killing people.

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